Death By Pedicure

So, I took Napoleon to the vet today, for his bordatella vaccination which they forgot to give him last week, when he got his distemper combo booster. He's got a little respiratory thing going right now, though, so he couldn't have the vaccination and got a check-up instead. Since his nails had gotten pretty long and sharp, I figured you know, what the heck, get his nails trimmed, and also since we're here, let's get his anal glands expressed, because he's been having some issues with that, and frankly, you get spooged on once with anal gland fluid, you've really been spooged on all you ever wanna be with anal gland fluid. That stuff stinks. (excuse me: that substance is malodorous.)

So anyway, I let the techs know that, and after Napoleon's checkup, two of them descend upon us to take care of it. They go to clip his nails, and holy crap, you never heard such a fracas. I'm not kidding. There was wailing, howling, whining, barking, wriggling, squirming, struggling, yelping, spazzing, and full-on pissed off Wookie noises. I actually lost it laughing at one point, because seriously, you'd have thought we were torturing the poor guy to death. People were poking their heads into the room to see what the hell was going on. It was Armageddon in there, peeps, I'm not kidding. I could not believe the ire and woe. He was genuinely freaking the hell out. It took a big guy tech to hold him down, me to talk to him and pet his head, and the girl doing all the trimming and sanding, who did an excellent job, especially given all his black nails, and she didn't make him bleed once. After it was done, one of the techs poked her head in and was all, "He's got a lot to say." I'll second that.

After that was done, they went to do the gland expressing thing, and when I realized they were going to do it from the inside, I got pretty grim over it, because dude, if he was that aggro over a little pedicure, how the heck is he gonna take having a finger shoved up his butt (even if it is just a little ways). I mean, he has a meltdown over the little thermometer thingie when they try to put it in his ear. So the guy gloves up and lifts Napoleon's tail, and I've got the puppy by the harness, trying to act all cool and calm about it so he won't freak out again, and next thing I know, the tech is all, "Well, the left one was totally full, but the right one's empty, that should be fine, now." And I'm like, huh? And he's all, "we're done."

And Napoleon didn't issue a peep. He didn't even squirm or try to sit down. Go figure.

So yay, all done, and then I get the bill.

For office visit, $45. For the nail trim, $15. For the glands?

$29.

For something that took literally fewer than 10 seconds. Unlike the nail trimming, which took close to 20 minutes and cost half as much.

So the whole bill was $89, which, ouch. Not that it's THAT much, but I *am* unemployed, and what was started out as a $10 vaccination ended up costing almost $100, AND he still has to go back for the vaccination in a week or 2, when he's cold symptom-free.

Ah, pets.

So we came home, and he played outside for a while, and I took some pictures of him playing, and then we played with Ty and Razzle as Ty threw Razzle's ball for him, and then we came in and had chewies, and now he's sleeping. And I'm going to my friend Jennifer's for a few hours, for dinner. I *should* find all my tax stuff, but this is the first time I've been out of the house and had a conversation with a friend in weeks (like, 3 or 4 of 'em), so I'm going, even if I do feel totally guilty about it.

Hope you guys have a good weekend.

peace out,
katie